Liquid Lunch: All I Want For Christmas Is Beer

Moses Malone, NEWBD Tap Takeover

Alright, Christmas is coming and I need socks and some MeUndies as much as the next guy, but what I’m really looking forward to this year is beer (who the hell am I kidding - that’s every year).  Here’s an opportunity for your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, or husband to really show how well they know you by hooking you up with a real quality beer related gift. Gift cards to the popular breweries are always welcomed of course (Proclamation, Treehouse, Long Live, Night Shift, Mystic, and even Trillium now that they pay their employees are just some of the card currencies that I accept).  What I’m going to be outlining here is a 4-pack of gift ideas for your significant other that show a little bit more thought than just a gift card…

1. Hopsulator 

Ok, I’ve had several of these...my co-host broke one on me when he attempted to throw it to me after a beer share when my reflexes were definitely not at 100%.  They are stainless steel, however the screw-on lid has a couple plastic components - so don’t throw it. If you can manage to keep it in 1 piece, they will keep your 16 oz beers so cold that you’ll swear you just took it out of the fridge.  It even comes with a little piece that you can put at the bottom of the Hopsulator so that you can use it with a 12 oz beer. AND you can even put that piece in the fridge if you want an added layer of cold to your beer, but in my opinion you shouldn’t need it.  Definitely $25 well spent - and this makes a great Yankee Swap or Secret Santa gift because it’s not super expensive.
​

---

Yeti Hopper Two 30 Cooler 

There are other coolers out there that claim to be as good as Yeti, but the proof is in the figgy pudding.  I brought this cooler to a wedding in New Hampshire because I was skeptical of the beer selection that would be offered (and rightly so).  I filled it with approximately 20 beers and 1 bag of ice that I found at the venue. This was on Friday. When I left on Sunday, there was a few beers left (alright, I was really drunk most of the time so the “beer selection” didn’t really matter THAT much) and they were still ICE COLD. There was almost no liquid at all in the bag because the ice hadn’t even really melted.  If keeping beers cold is important to you (and it’s SUPER important to me), then this $299 cooler is worth every single penny.

Glassware
​
No link for this one since it’s a little too general for one specific website.  If you know what breweries your loved one enjoys (Hint: Check his/her fridge - that’s always a good place to start), then you can check and see what glasses they may be missing from their collection.  Check the cabinets and see what they’re rocking with - maybe they’re missing a cool teku glass
or a quality tulip glass .
Take some inventory and head to one of their preferred breweries - glasses typically run between $6 - $12 and make a great gift.  Some get really creative with the artwork on their glasses, while some keep it pretty simple. Try to get a sense of what your loved one likes in their glassware, and then go to town!

Beer Making/Brewing Kit

Now I’m going to go in a different direction on this one, because I think I’ve given you a few pretty good suggestions.  DO NOT BUY YOUR LOVED ONE A BREW KIT!!! I repeat, DO NOT BUY YOUR LOVED ONE A BREW KIT. They always seem like a good idea to someone who is not familiar with beer, but let’s think about this for a second.  If your person is a beer nerd who loves to go to local spots for special releases and loves the awesome local breweries, why the hell would this person want to drink some shitty ass beer made with a beer kit purchased at Bed, Bath, and Beyond?!?  The only BBB I want beer from is Bissell Brothers - get the hell out of here with these stupid beer kits. Also, another thing: these brew kits never get used, I promise you. I have a friend who was gifted one as part of a Secret Santa a couple years back, and he has STILL not brewed anything.  We used to give him a hard time about it because of his lack of commitment, but honestly I don’t want him to use it. I know for a fact that that beer is going to be trash. Like, 100% guaranteed. No chance that it’s even drinkable, let alone good. Please, just don’t do it - do not buy one of these stupid kits.  Please.

---

Alright, so there are four pretty good ideas for Christmas this year - hope you people listen.  There’s nothing worse than getting ANOTHER glass that says like “Mo’s Bar” on it - I have 4 of them already.  Well, actually, I don’t have them anymore because I threw them in the trash where they belong. Just because I like beer doesn’t mean I want a glass or tee-shirt that says “I Drink Beer”.  I’d much rather have a glass, t-shirt, sweatshirt, etc from a brewery that I love and support. Plus, you’d be surprised how often a cool t-shirt, hat, or sweatshirt can lead to a conversation while in line at a brewery.  I’ve even met a trade partner this way before, so don’t underestimate the power of cool beer gear.  Sure, people make fun of me because basically all I wear is Red Sox gear and brewery apparel - but that’s just because they’re jealous of all the good beer I drink!  Cheers and Merry Christmas from the NEWBD boys!!

---

Read More 990WBOB

• Two Rhode Island Establishments Named Top 100 American Restaurants​
• Five Worst Christmas Songs of All-Time
• 990WBOB Alum & WPRI Reporter Kim Kalunian on her Journalistic Journey
• ​The Christmas Must-Have Gift for Rhode Islanders: Driving Lessons