Thanksgiving has come and gone. While some are thankful for
10. The Florida State University Seminole Fan: Who painted her face in the mirror, apparently not sure of how a reflection works, and wrote her team's name backwards so it read 'USF' instead of 'FSU.' See, that's why you have a friend do it for you.
9.Ndakumong Suh: Deny it all you want, you kicked Schaub in the crotch. Replays don't lie, son. You make the likes of Hines Ward and Rodney Harrison proud you have taken on the mantle of the NFL's dirtiest players.
8. Notre Dame Haters: Yup, that's pretty much everybody that doesn't appreciate the gold and blue. Tell me, how does beating a FBS team like Western Carolina make Alabama a powerhouse team? Get off the SEC teet and embrace a BCS Championship game where it's not going to be another SEC snorefest.
7. Cleveland Browns' Marketing Team: Apparently they thought a 'White-Flag' giveaway before Sunday's game against the Steelers was a smart marketing idea. Didn't know you could major in Dumbass.
6. Tom Jackson: The following clip is yet again proof of Tom Jackson's brilliance
Serioiusly Tom, shut the f**k. You were a half-ass NFL player and you are a half-ass commentator. But then again, this pathetic 'rant' is coming from a guy who back in 2010 picked the Patriots to kill the Jets in the Divisional playoff game, lost, but then came out and made some half-ass excuse saying he only picked the Pats to motivate the Jets.
5. Jim Schwartz: Why on God's green Earth would you throw the challenge flag on a reviewable call?! Jim: Durr...I lost my cool and got swept up in the emotion of it all...Herpa Derp. Because of that dumbasssery (I broke the Law of Merriam-Webster), it cost the Lions their lead and ultimately the game. Smooth move ex-lax
4. Black Friday Shoppers: Never understood why people would stand in line for hours in the cold to get $20 off a $400 item. Spoiler: You'll get the same kind of discount for the entire season, idiot.
3. NHL Owners: Cannot understand the logic of these owners: "Oh, we're losing profits because we sign players to these ridiculous amounts of money, we decide to have teams in markets that are horrible for hockey like in Phoenix, Florida, and Nashville. So let's lockout the players, cancel the very popular Winter Classic games as well as the All-Star game, and lose the season after we posted record numbers last year in attendance and popularity." F*****g idiots.
2. Mark Sanchez: The following clip has been rated 'WTF' for sheer stupidity.
That pretty much summarized the game and the season for Mr. Sanchez.
Double Turkey: Chris Collinsworth was wrong... as usual. Wilfork did not throw OG Brandon Moore into Sanchez. Sanchez ran into Moore's ass and fumbled the ball. Seriously, I think everybody in the stands knew that.
1. New York Jets: Watching a high school football game would have been more entertaining. Seriously, how can a team allow their opponent to score 3 TDs in 52 seconds and 35 points in a single quarter? Also, why did you dress a guy with a rib injury that you neglected to mention to everybody else before? Why did you bring in a guy who can't tell the difference between a goal line and the line of scrimmage as your offensive coordinator? Why do you guys f****g suck?! When Fireman Ed, a diehard Jets Fan, hangs up his hat in shame, you know you've f****d up royally.
Well that's it for Fox's Weekend Turkeys. Hey folks that if you screw up or do something dumb, just remember you could have been these jive ass turkeys.
-Ryan L. Fox
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