WBOB Original Reads

And the Best Water on Earth is?; Ranking the Best Brands of Water

4/23/2019

Tyler Krusz

Bottled water can be tricky. There’s so many to choose from, and most people just walk away buying the cheapest case of 24 they can find. “It’s all just water, they’re the same anyways,” they usually say. But they’re not.

Every bottle of water comes from a different source, or spring if you will. They each have their own tastes- some good, some bad, some just plain.

Here’s our rankings for the next time you feel parched.

999. Dasani

Dasani is disgusting. Even Family Guy knows it. Honestly, that clip says it the best. Every bottle of Dasani tastes like there is a nickel in it. It doesn’t taste like water, and it tastes like there’s something strange going on inside the bottle. Not what I want from my trusted H2O companies.

734. Sewage

If you’re really struggling, you can find water running down streets to and from sewage drains. Even bathwater or dishwater sometimes gets the job done. A simple pH test and you’re good to go. It's ranked low for a reason, but give it a go the next time you consider Dasani. Give it a comparison. Sewage reigns supreme.

5. Tap Water

This is what I usually resort to. Filling up empties with tap water, or using a refillable water bottle and hydrating from the sink. Depending on the area, this can be impossible, but if you’re located around decent drinking water it’s a great option. It saves a ton of money, reduces plastic waste which takes up most of our landfills, and it usually doesn’t kill you. That's always a plus.

4. Smart Water

Smart Water is unreal- probably getting sold short at the 4-spot. It has a unique smoothness to it, like number two on our list, that almost makes it seem colder. One thing that sets Smart Water aside from average bottles of water is its size, and that’s a pro and a con. Smart Water bottles are much taller than any other water bottle, and the squirt-cap helps with that. The only issue with the size is the trouble fitting these monsters into the sides of backpacks.

3. Acadia Spring Water (Stop n Shop)

Acadia is probably the best bang for your buck. The taste is similar to Deer Park, or any average brand, but much cheaper. It bottles in Acadia Natural Park in Maine, and they tap into springs much like Poland Springs does. My only complaint about Acadia water is the bottle itself. The neck is flimsy- causing the seal to break in a strange way, which in turn results in the cap never fully shutting. After opening an Acadia bottle, twist the cap as far right as you can go. It doesn’t stop. This leads to leakage and unnecessary waste of water that could go to children in need.

2. Fiji

Fiji Water almost took the top spot on this list. The taste is magnificent, to say the least, but definitely not worth the price that it is. The only turn-off, honestly, was the price. Fiji has a smaller bottle, and although the mL may be the same, the bottle is still smaller. Yet they charge almost double the price of a normal singular water bottle. It’s ridiculous. Now, Fiji does source and bottle their water on the “remote islands” of Fiji, and the water itself comes from an artesian aquifer (natural well) underground in Viti Levu. Sounds like a mouthful of some of the best H2O in the world, but just the second best bottled water you can find.

1. Poland Springs

This one is easy. The simple, basic, crisp Poland Spring bottled water. It’s the classic, and by far the best. Why though? I researched a little bit about where they get their water from- “Spring Water” is actually water tapped from an underground flowage of water that has a natural source- or a spring- where the water comes up. Poland Springs both collects their water from natural springs and taps the springs to access the underground stream. Their springs are in Maine, the state that just smells like fresh, clean air. You can’t possibly go wrong.

Stay hydrated. Just make sure that it's on the best tasting water available. They're not all the same.