GOOD MORNING FOOTBALL! HOW ARE YOU TODAY? GOOD MORNING FOOTBALL! HERE’S WHAT I HAVE TO SAY! WEEK 3 IS OVER WHILE WEEK 4 IS HERE! HEY, WHO’S THE JACKASS WHO DRANK THE LAST BEER?!
-Angry Charley Casserly
Ryan L. Fox
Yeesh! Settle down Angry Charley Casserly.
Well you know what time it is so I won’t bother with any corny intros. A special note for this week’s pick’ems is that one of the NFL games is gonna be played across the pond. Who’s playing in London and who did I pick? Let’s find out.
LAST WEEK’S RECORD: 1-3
So after starting really hot in Week 2, it all came back down to earth in Week 3 and boy was the landing rough. Now I know how the Houston Texans felt after getting their doors blown off by the Pats after going 2-0.
OVERALL RECORD: 4-4
Hmm….so this is what it’s like to be the Buffalo Bills. Kinda sucks. Hopefully that record will improve after this week.
Indianapolis Colts @ Jacksonville Jaguars
Sunday @ 9:30 a.m.
The only reason why this game gets an honorable mention is because it’s the first of three games being played over in London, England this season. It’s a tossup between these two teams. Jacksonville has the defense to slow down the Colts offense but the Jags offense is something less than to be desired (18 ppg for 25th overall).
Once again, like so many other NFL London Games, it’ll just become a one-sided affair and make the folks across the pond wonder why us Americans would bother do watch such a ‘dull & dreary’ sport.
Buffalo Bills @ New England Patriots
Sunday @ 1:00 p.m. ET
This is the final game that the Patriots will be Brady-less, much to what a lot of Pats fans and media members is the chagrin to the NFL (specifically Uncle Roger). But what makes this 3-0 start impressive is the fact they’re doing it without their best players (i.e. RB Dion Lewis, RT Sebastian Volmer, TE Rob Gronkowski).
Now let’s look at the 1-3 Bills.
The Patriots could be without even more players and it still would not make a difference in this match up. Patriots will be up 4-0 when Brady comes back to do his *snerk* ‘scorched earth campaign’ that Pats fans and media are hollering about.
Dallas Cowboys @ San Francisco 49ers
Sunday @ 4:25 p.m. ET
This game is going to be won on one front: the trenches. Unfortunately for the 49ers, the Cowboys boast one of the top offensive lines in the game right now that harkens back to the ‘Great Wall’ Cowboys offensive that help the team win 3 Super Bowls in 4 years during the early 90s. Not to mention the fact that rookie QB Dak Prescott is starting to look comfortable under center and rookie RB Ezekiel Elliot is starting to pick up track after being stifled in Week 1 (21 carries, 83 yards, TD in WK2 & 30 carries, 140 yards in WK3).
The bad news for the Cowboys is that they’ll probably be without WR Dez Bryant, who has a hairline fracture in his knee. But most notable, they’ll be without G La’el Collins (torn ligament in foot) as well as DE Randy Gregory (suspension) for a long time.
Injuries and suspensions aside, this should be a winnable game for a team with a good amount of talent on both sides of the football.
If there is such a place called hell, it has frozen over with this pick.
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers
Sunday @ 8:30 p.m. ET
Ha! You people thought I was going to go for the Monday football matchup for the final pick huh (by the way, we all know who I would have picked anyways). This is game marks the first game Steelers RB La’Von Bell will be starting (missed the first 3 games due to drug suspension). He rejoins an offense that could use a boost (354.0 ypg for 21st overall) and couldn’t muster anything during last week’s 34-3 blowout by the Eagles.
However even with the bolster of the offense, the Steelers defense is still a work in progress (28th overall in yards per game (407.3), 31st against the pass (332.0 ypg)). Not to mention they only have 1.0 sack and 2 interceptions after 3 games.
Chiefs, on the other hand, are a team that won’t wow you on the scoreboard or stat sheet. The play a conservative style on offense that doesn’t put QB Alex Smith into situations where he has to throw the ball all over the place (1 int in 3 games). Not to mention they actually have a guy in CB Marcus Peters who, unlike Josh Norman, will mostly likely be covering Antonio Brown and possible shut him down.