Panic at URI: Gunman or Zombies?

 I receive a call... my buddy says “you’re not going to believe it, there might be gunman at URI.”  My reply: “Are you F**king kidding me, why are people snapping?"

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My bud says this is not confirmed yet but my friends are tweeting me the cops on down there. 

Fifteen minutes later he calls me and says it is a hoax there is no gunman, according to my friends tweeting from URI , I replied “Thank God. “Two Questions:

1) Did the Progressive Democrats & Liberal News create an environment of fear and paranoia in the minds and hearts of the public to push their Constitution stripping agenda?

2) How come I knew it was a hoax within thirty minutes but the mainstream media had NO CLUE to this Non-story or did they?

A college guy is yelling, "I'm a nice guy, I'm a nice guy" and some college girl screams "Oh my God!"  and the next thing that happens is complete meltdown of a gunman on campus. Some girl was so encompassed by fear of the entire gun grabbing demonization being implemented by the Liberal Left she went into panic mode and the local mainstream news whores had cameras rolling  hoping for that one shot and frothing at the mouths like Pavlov’s dogs looking a pork chop, yet I knew the was no danger to the students.

Every 10 minutes all local news outlets were giving all the parents of URI students heart attacks but they sold ratings and an anti gun agenda. I saw police German Sheppard’s, I saw men in black with REAL assault rifles, I saw scared college girls , I saw the Mainstream Media selling Fear and of course I saw the biggest WHORES  the Politicians selling Their Propaganda to the horrified Parents, Grandparents , Aunts, Uncles and siblings  of these college students . There was Dem.  Sen. Jack Reid, there was Dem. James Langevin ACTING LIKE CARNIVAL BARKERS  saying  ban all guns and all your ills will be cured, heck you can even get an erections like you were a college kid.

I swear the so called reporters were dying for a story, they were hoping for a story, they wanted a story and deep down inside they wanted their career monument with tears in their eyes blaming all this violence on conservative white guys instead of looking at themselves for GLORIFING the type of Crap.

So here is the Real Story without panic. Nobody is sure? It Might have been a game called "Humans vs. Zombies," Students identify themselves as zombies and the humans shoot them with a NURF GUN. Yes I said A Yellow, Blue, Green, Red and Purple NURF GUN! I f you can’t tell the difference I have a bridge to sell you. I say it was Fear.

If you want to be safe do away with Gun Free Zones and exercise your right to defend yourself and carry a firearm on your person legally. And stop being manipulated by the Politically Correct Idiots.

God Save us all.
WildSide Prof. David Clyde